Okay, let's be honest. The hottest summer of your life, right? Even as we speak, it's one of those damp,
oppressive evenings that Tennessee Williams got at least three plays out of. Right now, the only relief
in sight is, not so fast. Remember, on January 15th, you may miss this very much. So on tonight's Back
Porch Bloomington, a few sweaty performances by myself and the boys, balanced ever so nicely by the
tuba santas.
The fighting cop girl makes me mad. So I stopped the car and I turned around. That girl in the edge
went back to town. It's another week without something to show her. But I'm better off poor than a scavenger.
I don't want to work for no friend.
I need a job and I'm bad, bad I need a job and I'm bad, bad
I've seen her in the movies. I've seen her in the magazine. I remember love eternally even when I work
a handheld dream. Well, she looks so good in lipstick and those grown-up clothes. I was helpless as
a baby when she starts her pose.
And I saw her was underneath a movie parking. She was posing on a poster looking grown up as a child
could be. Well, I must have been a pal when I was younger than me. The only thing I'm looking for is
one little kiss. Sometimes she acts precocious. I know she's just an average girl.
She might be six years out of diverse, but to me, she's still a bride to me. Well, I know that in the
40s, she'll be nothing at all. By then, I'll probably graduate to law in the fall. Got cardboard in
the frame, you know my taste good.
I've seen her in the movies. I've seen her in the magazines. I remember love eternally when I wake up
and I'll grin. Well, she looked so good in lipstick and those Calvin clients. The most helpless ass
of baby, Lord, I wish she were mine. Some say she acts precocious. I know she's just an average girl.
Thank you.
Don't you know what's going on? I've been taking shots all night to beat Rumpage at the turn out ride.
And it's all been happening right next door. Why ever since those two moved in to turn that trailer
to a den of sin, I've been sending you a tire.
I know there's a lot still on the books If you don't end Paul, somehow will that look? Cause it's all
been happening right next door
They don't even wait till it's late. You better conduct the raid as soon as you can. I say, looky here,
looky here. I say, looky here, looky here. Hey, Sheriff, don't let no one's going on. I got my telephoto
lens, 16 rolls of evidence. And it's all been happening right next door.
the rain as soon as you can. And I'll be a slap on the cuffs, drag them out and make them rub them up.
And tell them what you've got for proof. And when they ask where you get that from, you can't tell them
your wisdom as they come. It's all been happening right next door.
Tell me, why are you kids going to stay in New York? We're not staying in New York, we're booked for
over the holidays. Where? The Colombian pine tree Vermont. Oh, that sounds very Vermont-y. Should be
beautiful this time of the year in Vermont, all that snow and everything. Yeah, yeah, beautiful.
Herd trees, clean pine air. Very beautiful, just what we need. Oh, wonderful. Could you come up for
a couple of days?
Well, I don't know. I wish you could. It'd be awfully nice. Miss Haynes, if you're ever under a falling
building and somebody runs up and offers to pick you up and carry you to safety, don't think,
don't pause, don't hesitate a moment. Just spit in his eye. What did that mean? It means we're going
to Vermont. Oh, boy! Might not be bad at that, you know, the snow-covered slopes and skiing.
Christianas and the stemming and the potsing and the shushing, hot buttered rum, light on the butter,
and snow. Snow, snow. Snow, snow, snow. It won't be long before we'll all be there with snow. Snow,
snow. I want to wash my hands, my face, and hair with snow.
Snow, I long to clear a path and lift a spade of snow. Snow, to see a great big man entirely made of
snow. Snow, where it's snowing all winter through. That's where I want to be. Snowball throwing, that's
what I'll do.
I'm longing to ski through the snow Those glistening houses that seem to be built of snow Snow To see
a mountain covered with a quilt of snow What is Christmas with no snow? Snow White Christmas with no
snow Snow Snow Snow
I'll soon be there with snow. I'll wash my hair with snow. And with a spade of snow, I'll build a man
that's made of snow. I'd love to stay up with you, but I recommend a little shut-eye go to sleep.
Christmas concert on the square in Bloomington. We want to thank you all for coming and especially for
bringing all these lovely children. Our first selection was a destiny for Dallas, O Come All Ye Faithful.
We're going to play it again and we hope you will remember the words to at least the first verse and
that you might sing it through with us the second time around. So we'll give it to you once more and
then please join us and sing O Come All Ye Faithful.
Time around.
our fine citizens have been laid off their jobs. We do have a high unemployment rate, certainly higher
than last Christmas, and our needs are much greater than ever before. So please open your hearts, open
your wallets, and we have two tuba bells up here which are welcome to receive your contributions. And
I know that many people during the Christmas
great services of the Salvation Army. We'll be most grateful to you. A very, very great Christmas Carol.
not blitzin'. Uh, has a big red nose, I remember that. Who? Who? Rudolph! Rudolph! You've got it. Thanks
a lot. I would never have gotten to this song without that.
One, two, three.
a charter bus to Kalamazoo, Michigan. If anybody would like to sign up in the back. Elvis is living
there. We'll be taking the video crew. According to at least two magazines I read, he's up there in
Kalamazoo and we're going to go visit him. He's dropped out of sight since his untimely demise in 1977.
The last word from the Weekly World News was that Priscilla was buying him some slacks at Safeway.
I thought he got his slacks by mail. Oh, there's a change in the life. Son of a gun. We're going to
go up to Kalamazoo and visit with the king. This is a king song. You know this, Juan.
be found I'm sitting here all alone if you can come around at least on the telephone but now don't be cruel
It was something that I might have said. Oh, please let's forget the past. Because the future looks
bright ahead. Now don't be cruel.
Yes.
Hello.
It's a hardware here on the piano. It's a bowling trophy, the American Legion President's Award, 1985.
And I'm ashamed to say I bought it at the Salvation Army for 75 cents. But my bowling game ain't bad.
It's genetic to Polish people that they can bowl halfway decently. I've got a good hook.
put it up here for inspiration. All right. This tune is, I bowl these games for you.
You must know it's true. I love you, baby. You must know it's true. For over 15 years, I've owned these
games for you.
that match the crystal set. I want them all for you. You'll spend those nights alone. But ain't it nice
to know you helped to win them too. I get scared when I told that lie.
Look on your sweet face I feel fine I love you baby You must know it's true
hounding you, oh, honeybunch. Yeah, honeybunch, why don't you sell that joy and come away with me? Today
you got a phone call from that man downtown. He wrote that letter you threw away. It's Monday, 9 o'clock.
He'll tell you what they found. On it that his office made a year of taxes you haven't paid, honeybunch.
Back porch Bloomington is underwritten in part
by a grant from Cook, Incorporated.