- Good evening. Say it out louder so I know you can hear me. Good evening. Good evening. So welcome to
- something like the 40th holiday follies. We don't know for sure. Let's see. I don't think it says it
- on, but we've had about 40 holiday follies. My name is Rock. I'm the director of the school. And obviously
- on behalf of
- the students and faculty of the school, we want to welcome you all for coming tonight. Those of you
- that haven't seen the Follies before, it started with the idea of having a talent show. And so we have
- just a wide variety of acts, but the emphasis is on show, not necessarily the first word. So just really
- support the kids doing it.
- They have a great time doing it. Sometimes they get a little nervous, to say the least. But the support
- from the audience really, really helps a lot during the show. I want to thank, we have sponsors for
- the show. But before we talk about the sponsors, provide money that goes to the Harmony School Scholarship
- Fund. About 90% of the kids here get some kind of scholarship
- support, so we really appreciate all the supporters, and I'll be naming those here in a few minutes.
- But most importantly, usually we don't really encourage people. We encourage people, but we certainly
- don't strongly encourage them to make a donation the night of the Follies. It's really our gift to you,
- the families and friends and alumni, family and friends and former alumni. It's our gift to all of you.
- But we had quite a tragedy for one of our families last
- I think it was Thursday night, one of the really cold nights. And their property, which is about 10,000
- square feet of commercial space and their house in Lyons, Indiana, which is out in the western part
- of Greene County, they just had a horrible fire, just a horrible fire. And it was all over the news
- if you lived in that part of the state and the Terre Haute newspaper covered it. So it was really, really bad.
- the insurance issues in question, and they need a lot of help. And they have a GoFundMe page where they're
- trying to raise $8,000, but they're very much short of that goal, and they need a lot more help. And
- I don't know if they're QR. I think there might be a QR code out there that you can take a picture of
- that takes you to the GoFundMe page. But we're also trying to encourage people to make a donation tonight
- at the door, and you can do that at intermission. We're trying to raise a thousand.
- take in about $300 tonight at the Follies. But we're really trying to take in $1,000 tonight to give
- to the family to get through the holidays. And at intermission, there's high schools selling food for
- the spring trip. But they're also going to have a box there, if I get it there, to make donations at
- the food window over here in the kitchen. So if you can really give something
- If you didn't do it already coming in, please do. The family needs a lot of help, and our thoughts are
- really with them. Can we give a shout out for the family, please? Just say, hip, hip, hooray! Oh! They
- do need a lot of support. Also, for those of you that may be new to the building, there's two bathrooms
- downstairs here. They're both right out here in the hallway and the other one.
- is down on the long hallway. They're both gender neutral bathrooms, so anybody can use them. This year,
- while this is around the 40th year for the Follies, this is, I just want to acknowledge, this is the
- 50th year for Harmony School. We did a big celebration in June, and those of you that attended, we really
- appreciate it, but all of you that have lent us your support through the years, I really appreciate
- that, and we really appreciate you guys supporting the school.
- Let's hear for Harmony, too, for 50 years. So I want to thank our sponsors for tonight. The primary
- sponsor is Commercial Service, which has really been a strong friend of Harmony. They also sponsor our
- golf tournament, many other things. That's called a standing ovation sponsorship, so you don't have
- to stand, but let's hear for Commercial Service.
- And then one of our families is an Encore sponsor, and they are the Brightside Cafe over in Fountain
- Square. So the Moore family, so. Then we have Baker Family Dentistry, Southern Indiana Pediatric Dentistry,
- Bill C. Brown Associates, Cassidy Electric, Avers Pizza, the Inkwell Bakery and Cafe, and John Bethel
- Title Company.
- So thank you to all of our sponsors. We appreciate that. So I want to acknowledge Elaine, who's been
- the director, the director this year, wherever, I don't know if the spotlight can find Elaine, but Elaine
- stepped in to be the director this year while Todd was on sabbatical, and Todd has pitched in a lot too.
- Other faculty, Zevin and Wes and Jamie have just done a wonderful job. And I want to bring out the students
- that you won't see on stage tonight, but they're really helping a lot, are the two people up on the
- spotlight, Keegan and Hannah. Keegan, Vivian,
- Hannah on the spotlight. So I also wanted to, if you guys could shine the spotlight on Aidan and Ava
- down there. And then we have Sefirah and Mayella and a bunch of people here in front. I think Mayella
- is like the student director or something like that, so.
- But we really want to thank all them. And then we have the people backstage who want to come out here,
- the stage crew. If you guys want to come out here and say... So thanks to all you guys. So everybody,
- so thank you for helping everybody. You guys can get back, but these are the people that, the ones I
- mentioned are the people that you don't see on stage tonight that have made this whole thing a reality.
- We have all the emcees that Jamie has worked with, and I'm gonna turn it over to the two first emcees
- here in a minute. So again, thank you. It's not the solstice yet. I mean, we have a couple more days
- for the solstice, but for those of you who haven't been here before, oftentimes it's on the solstice,
- so we want to do a harmony howl for the solstice, okay? So one, two, three.
- Okay, so happy holidays to all of you. This is our gift to you. Enjoy yourselves. Thank you. Don't forget
- the family, please. It needs help. Hello and welcome to the 347th
- the Biennial Harmony Holiday Follies. Thank you so much for coming to see your amazing children perform.
- I didn't think most of you could see the quotation marks. It's fine. Please refrain from entering or
- exiting the gym during acts. But talking on your phone is highly encouraged. Call grandma, brag, we
- don't care.
- Talking on your phone is highly encouraged. I already did that bit. Yeah. Yeah, okay. It's fine.
- It's fine. Now we've got a heck of a show tonight. So our first act is The Birds by the ECP. Wait, wait,
- wait. Let me hear some noise. I always wanted to do that. I always wanted to do that.
- You can move it to the birds. It's probably good. My voice too? So is this too much then? Okay.
- You're back to your feet up against the mat, okay?
- Fly through my window, my turtle love Fly through my window, my turtle love Fly through my window, my
- turtle love
- Fly through my window, carnal, carnal, fly through my window, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal,
- carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal,
- carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, carnal, car
- Turkey vulture, turkey vulture, fly through my window. Turkey vulture, turkey vulture, fly through my
- window. Turkey vulture, turkey vulture, fly through my window. Turkey vulture, turkey vulture, will
- I put an event on?
- Turkey vulture, turkey vulture, well, I'll pour you me ventana. Turkey vulture, turkey vulture, well,
- I'll pour you me ventana. Cobra, caramelo, spinach, and banana. Fly through my window, my window. Fly
- through my window, my window. And by my light, please stand.
- Our bluebirds fly through my window. Our bluebirds fly through my window. Our bluebirds fly through
- my window.
- Bluebird, bluebird, will a-pour me ventana. Bluebird, bluebird, will a-pour me ventana. Bluebird, bluebird,
- will a-pour me ventana. Fly through my window, my turtle love. Fly through my window, my turtle love.
- And fly, my lost sister.
- Little bird, little bird, fly through my window. Little bird, little bird, fly through my window.
- Little bird, little bird, fly through my window. Fly in my box of candy. Parito, parito, vuela por mi
- ventana. Parito, parito, vuela por mi ventana. Parito, parito, vuela por mi ventana.
- I fly through my window, my turnip, fly through my window, my turnip and my molasses cake.
- That act was just wow. Wow. Okay. That act was just good. It reminds me of a joke. Hey, Nori. Hey, what?
- What do you call a pile of cats? I don't know. What? A meow-ton. That's a good one. Hey, Morgan. What?
- Knock, knock.
- Barbie. Barbie who? Barbecue chicken. Halo Lynn. Hey what? Knock knock. Who's there? Donut. Donut who?
- Donut open, it's a trick. And the next act is Jingle Bells by Myra and Carson.
- We need to start over. We need to start over. We're going to do it again. Okay. Jingle bells,
- jingle bells, jingle all the way. Oh, what fun it is to ride in one horse open sleigh. Hey. Jingle bells,
- jingle bells, jingle all the way. Oh, what fun it is to ride in one horse open sleigh. Hey. Dash, shake
- through the snow.
- Oh Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells.
- Wow, that was a really good act. Hey, Morgan. What? Knock, knock. Who's there? Cash. Cash who? No,
- thank you. I prefer all bids. Hey, Lil Lin. Hey, what? Knock, knock.
- Who's there? Dish. Dish who? Dish is the funniest joke ever. That's really funny. Hey, Nori. What? What
- did one strawberry say to the other strawberry? I don't know. What did it say? It said, if you weren't
- so fresh, we wouldn't be in this jam. That's a good one.
- Taxi by the K2 class.
- Wow, that act was really good. Anyway, hey Nori. What? What did the fish say when it swam into this
- net wall? I don't know, what? Damn. Hey Morgan. What? What do you call a cow and a duck? I don't know,
- what? Quackers and milk. Hey Lil' Lynn. Hey what? Knock knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank who? You're welcome.
- Hey, Nori. What? Knock, knock. Who's there? I owe. I owe who? Me. Now when are you going to pay me back?
- OK. And the next act is Homemade Ocarina by Brion.
- Hey, that act was wonderful, wasn't it? Okay, okay. I submitted my application to be an investor on
- Shark Tank and they finally got back to me. Isn't this a show where the divers swim with the big great
- white sharks? No, you're thinking of Shark Week. Shark Tank is when... Shark Tank
- is the one where people pitch business ideas to sharks, millionaire investors. If they like their ideas,
- they get a startup check to fund their plan. Oh, that's less entertaining. Are you kidding? Shark Tank
- is the best reality show on TV, even better than the greatest reality show of all time, Brooklyn Nine-Nine.
- So that letter says whether you get to be a shark or not, like a millionaire investor? Uh-huh. We'll
- open it already.
- This is great. I'm so proud of you. All right. The next act is Science Tricks by Gentle Lily and Anthony.
- Hello, hello. And now witness the awesome power of science.
- Science, science, science. First, we have Lily erupting a volcano. Wait for it. And now, Anthony demonstrates
- the power of magnetism.
- And last but certainly not least, Jindal will demonstrate the power of gravity, gravity, gravity, with
- an egg drop, drop, drop. Yeah, science, science.
- That act was amazing. Dad, dad, I'm so excited. I'm going to be an investor on Shark Tank. Oh, cool.
- I'm so proud of you, son. I'm glad you got our crippling debt so suspiciously fast while also being
- filed for unemployment. All in a day's work, I guess. On an unrelated note, I'm going to go get ready
- now. But first, I want to tell a joke. Two whales.
- or in a bar, and one whale says, and the other whale goes, go home, Frank, you're drunk. That's amazing.
- The next act is The Science Project Goes Wrong by Jillian and Shailen.
- I don't know if you saw, but a ladder fell on me backstage. I'm going through it. Jillian and Shailen
- are working in their science lab, science lab, science lab. All will be OK as long as no one spills
- Experiment X on them, Experiment X, Experiment X. It's a funny bit.
- just died and you're applauding.
- What a unique act. What a unique one, indeed. Excuse me, is this a set for Sharknado 4? Uh, what? Sharknado
- 4, the flippering. This is a show, this is a set for a show with sharks. So, Sharknado 4, perfect. What
- do you know about sharks?
- What do I know about sharks? Well, they have to understand different business models and marketing,
- but mostly just be smart. Well, I love them. Even if they do have funky teeth. What? And beady eyes.
- Oh my God! And they're kind of ugly. Downright evil.
- But I don't really see them as powerful or anything. How dare you say I'm not powerful? Do you even
- understand what you just said? I could purchase your whole estate and put you on the streets with the
- snap of my fingers. Sharks don't have fingers. Anyways.
- The next act is if you're happy and you know it, with Edda, Emma, Xylem, excuse me, and Cece.
- The last lecture was pretty good. What do you think, Oliver? Yeah, it was pretty good. Yeah, you could
- say that. Hey, Lucas. Yeah? Why did the M&M go to school? Why did the M&M go to school? Because he wanted
- to be smarty. There's a lot of people here. I don't remember that being in the rehearsing.
- I don't recall that. Hey Oliver, why should you never eat a clock? I don't know. Why should you never
- eat a clock? It's time consuming. Ollie?
- Why, I heard that laugh. Our next act is Magic Tricks by Ezra and Wicks. That kind of rhymed. Mike better fall.
- My first trick, I'm gonna make this water disappear. And for my next act, I'll need my lovely assistant
- over there.
- to pick cards. Show it to those people. Is this your card? No.
- And now my lovely assistant will make me disappear with cloth.
- I was going to say a spotlight would be real convenient. Magic tricks. Hang on. It's on, Ollie. Just
- talking to it. You got it. OK. We've got jokes. That's the thing that we do. Ollie, you know what happens
- to an illegally parked frog? I don't know what happens. It gets towed away.
- You get it? Because they're both amphibians, they're not the same. But you know how it is. Yeah,
- there you go. A game. Yeah. What kind of car does a dog drive? What kind of car does a dog drive?
- A Ferrari. He does this all the time. That's his only joke. Why? I like it hard. Yuki, you want to do
- one? Yeah.
- Hey, Gabe, how come frogs are such good liars? How come? Because they're amphibians. Not bad, not bad.
- We're ready? OK. The next act is going to be Have It All by Jason Mraz, sung by the third and fourth
- class. The three, four, the third and fourth grade.
- If you could just give a shout out to Winston and Coley out there who should be with us. Hi Winston!
- You can get through it. Okay. Are you scared? May you have a success or a success. May you have confidence
- in your best.
- You're going to get nothing more, nothing less. May you know the meaning of the word happiness. May
- you always be full of meaning in your test. May you be free to act as you need to be. May you get your
- rest. May you get your rest. And may the best of your todays lead the worst of your tomorrows. Whoa!
- May the road that's laid be the road that you follow. Whoa! Well, here's to the hearts that you're going to break.
- Here's to the infinite possible ways to love you. I want you to have it all. Here's to the good times
- we're gonna have. You don't need money, you gotta free pass. Here's to the fact that I'll be sad without
- you. I want you to have it all.
- May you keep the chaos in the corner of your desks. May you keep the chaos in the corner of your desks.
- May you keep the chaos in the corner of your desks.
- I want you to have it all. I want you to have it all.
- Yeah!
- That was an interesting act. Yeah, that was a good act. Did you know that if a gecko gets attacked or
- even just really scared, it drops its tail, runs off, and then grows a new one? That's crazy. Yeah,
- geckos are amazing animals. That actually reminds me of a few jokes.
- Why are geckos born storytellers? Which one of us? Oh, I don't know. Why? Because dropping a tail is
- their nature. Hey, who's the judge? I have a joke, too. A gecko was cast in a play, but she had stage
- fright. So she dropped her tail. Was she in The Follies?
- You say I remember that. Hold on. I remember that. That tail stuck around. Was she in the Follies? That's
- a good question. I don't know. I have a joke too. What do you call a gecko that's 50% off?
- I don't know, what? A salamander. That's a knee slapper. The next act is All I Went for Christmas is
- You by Emma and Clara.
- Get this thing on. Get me over there in the back, huh? Okay, good. Okay. Okay, how are you doing, folks,
- so far, huh? Yeah. That was pretty good, huh? What did you say? Yeah. Yeah. Pretty good piano, you know?
- Yeah. But it's not as good as these jokes, though, wouldn't you say, huh?
- You folks will know soon enough, though, so. Hey, Lucas. Yeah, what is it? What do you call an elf wearing
- earmuffs? I don't know. What do you call an elf wearing earmuffs? Anything you want. He can't hear you.
- Oh, yeah. That's true. Yeah. But also, I'm pretty sure the next act you're probably going to need earmuffs for.
- Yeah. Or like earplugs or something. A little hint of advice. Yeah. If you brought any of those items,
- go get them now. Yeah. I feel like there should be around out in the hallway. Far away. Or else they're
- sold out. Yeah. Which would be a shame. I might have bought all of them. But our next act is Pizza Day
- with Mike and the Mechanics? OK. What? Mechanics? I guess so. OK. Give a round of applause, everyone.
- Feel free to jump in on the chorus as the song progresses. All right, ready? All right. All right, ready?
- P-I-double-Z-A-D-A, pizza day. P-I-double-Z-A-D-A, pizza day. All you need is a couple of dollars. Listen
- to those children holler. P-I-double-Z-A-D-A.
- Well, a couple of the kids in the ECP forgot their lunch and they were worried. But then they remembered
- that it was Thursday and they'd get some pizza if they had some money. Out in the hallway waiting in
- line, the K2 kids were waiting for the time when they could choose their favorite kind to get a slice
- or two of that pizza pie. P-I-double-Z-A-D-A, pizza day. P-I-double-Z-A-D-A, pizza day. All you need
- is a couple of dollars, listen.
- Those children holler P-I-D-Z-A-D-A pizza day Well the three, four kids were trying to see Just how
- much pizza they could eat Paul told them not to compete But Todd just ate his seventh piece Upstairs
- you had me and Colleen Trying to keep the classroom clean At least by the standards of harmony But everywhere
- you looked was pepperoni P-I-D-Z-A-D-A pizza day P-I-D-Z-A-D-A pizza day
- All you need is a couple of dollars. Listen to those children holler, P-I-C-C-A-D-A, Pizza Day. And
- then you had the middle school and the high school kids feeling pretty cool. But on Pizza Day, we're
- all the same. If you want to eat, then you got to wait. So let's give it up for all the volunteers.
- Student solidarity year after year. And sure, let's all give Zevon a cheer. After this, let's buy him a pizza.
- P-I-double-Z-A-D-A pizza day. P-I-double-Z-A-D-A pizza day. All you need is a couple of dollars. Listen
- to those children holler. P-I-double-Z-A-D-A pizza day. All you need is a couple of dollars. Listen
- to those children holler. P-I-double-Z-A-D-A pizza day.
- Wow. That was better than I expected. But did you get your earmuffs? Not me. You should have. That made
- me hungry, though. Yes. Our next act is touch.
- Song by Avery, Willow, and Eliza. Get your earmuffs now, now.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. And now, why did the fox cross the road?
- Chasing the chicken. What are 10 things you can always count on?
- Your fingers. Why did the fish cross the road? To get to the other tide. How can dads get to
- who get so many good puns. They have a whole database for them. But anyway, the next act is Anne Doran's
- Boomwhackers, played by Gus, Aidan, Winston, Ava, and some of the staff members.
- Really quiet. Wow, you're that addicted, huh? Indeed. Our next act is All I Want for Christmas is Grew
- by, uh, Maxwell, what is it? Maxwell Schmeiken.
- I think it's schmarken. No, it's not. I'm pretty sure it's schmarken. No. Alright.
- show so far. Yeah. Let's hear some noise. Yeah. Woo. Yeah. Woo. Can I give you a clap for the stage
- crew and tech crew? Yeah. Give them a round of applause, everybody. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Come on.
- Come on. Yeah. Woo. Woo. Yeah. All right. All right. All right. So do you want to tell some jokes, Lucas,
- or should I? I don't know. Did you know when the chicken crossed the road it died?
- Why is that? Because it died. It got ran over by a car. Yeah, that'll happen. But anyway, hey folks,
- what do you call an old snowman? A puddle. Ghost? Are we good ready? This is going on live television, right?
- I think it's going on YouTube. Whoa. Okay. Wait, don't... Hold on. How many O's does it take to make
- a beanbag chair? I don't know. How many? Six! Every stuff and men real tight. Um, one if we... Can we
- count me? So that would probably like take like two if we counted me. I guess so. Yeah, but... Anyway.
- Like three at least?
- Do you want to introduce the actors? Oh, the next act is Harmony Mother Candy Cane by Umi, Morgan, Clara,
- Emma, Cece, Zion, Shailen, and Laureln.
- We need a spotlight. Hello? Yeah. Hey, folks, we're back. You didn't say anything. Yeah. Focus on us.
- Yeah. Yeah. They got the spotlights on us, so focus. Not on those guys. Yeah. But I'd like to give a
- thanks for some of my family that came here. I think Lucas would, too. Hey, Mom, raise your hand. Mom,
- raise your hand. Yeah. Oh, I can't see. I need to use my flashlight. Yeah. You're not my mom.
- Perfect line. Okay, whoever is Lucas's mom, clap your hand. Not you! You're not my mom! You're older,
- you're younger than him, come on. You could never be my mom. Anyway, so I'd like to- And I wouldn't
- want you to be my mom. But, ouch. Anyway, so I'd like to give thanks to my mom.
- because she will be living after intermission. So I'd like to say, hey, mom, could you clap back there
- so we know you're here? Hello. Hello. And also, I'd like to thank my aunt and uncle for coming here
- from a little bit away. Oh, OK. And also dad, who found time through a lot of stuff. Let me introduce
- the next act.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Go ahead, go ahead. The next act is Scream by Leon Jackson and John. That's
- gonna be our last act, so bye!
- Did you miss us? No, okay, that's fair. I got this sick fur vest from my sister, somewhere in there.
- I got a vest, it's pretty, look at this. Look at that. Umi, you wanna start us off? Do you wanna do
- some jokes while we're waiting, while we're stalling, desperately stalling? Well, first off, hey Gabe.
- Oh no, yes.
- How many bagels could a bagel chuck chuck if a bagel chuck could chuck bagels? You're doing this bit.
- Okay, yeah. How many bagels could a bagel bagel? Well, if a bagel chuck could chuck bagels, a bagel
- chuck could chuck as many bagels as a bagel chuck could chuck bagels. That... You do realize it's just
- the wood chuck thing, but fitting into Umi's whole bagel obsession. I can't explain it.
- Don't give them that serial killer grin. What are you doing? Just finish the thing. Come on. Though
- I can't chuck as many bagels as a bagel chuck could chuck bagels. Okay. Because that's too much gluten
- to chuck as many bagels as a bagel chuck could chuck bagels. Certainly.
- Though if a bagel chuck could chuck bagels, I'd be pretty concerned. I'm going to humor it. Why would
- you be concerned? Because a bagel chuck doesn't even exist. Yuki, you want to come up here and tell
- a joke or two? I got one to start you off. What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
- You know, a bird can fly, but a fly can't bird. Somebody laughed at that. I'm happy. You do one. Oh,
- they're good. Never mind. Actually, you know what? You do a bit. We'll introduce them in a minute.
- You know, Gabe. Okay. We got Baby Shark by the 5'6", because of course they're doing Baby Shark.
- Baby shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo Baby shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo Baby shark Baby Vivian, doo,
- doo, doo, doo, doo Baby Vivian, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo Baby Vivian Baby Norrie, doo, doo, doo, doo,
- doo Baby Norrie, doo, doo, doo, doo Baby Norrie Baby Morgan, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo Baby Morgan, doo,
- doo, doo, doo Baby Morgan, doo, doo, doo, doo
- Baby Morgan. Baby Ari doo doo doo doo doo. Baby Ari doo doo doo doo doo. Baby Ari doo doo doo doo doo.
- Baby Ari. Baby Shay doo doo doo doo doo. Baby Shay doo doo doo doo doo. Baby Shay. Baby Lucas doo doo
- doo doo doo. Baby Lucas doo doo doo doo doo. Baby Lucas doo doo doo doo doo.
- Baby Cyrus, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo Baby Cyrus, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo Baby Cyrus Baby Ollie, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo
- Baby Ollie, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo Baby Ollie Baby Sage, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo Baby Sage, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo
- Baby Sage, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo Baby Sage Baby Laura, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo
- Oliver doo doo doo doo doo, baby, Oliver doo doo doo doo doo, baby, Oliver. Baby Bella doo doo doo doo
- doo, baby, Bella doo doo doo doo doo, baby, Bella. Baby Rock doo doo doo doo doo, baby, Rock doo doo
- doo doo doo, baby, Rock.
- The last act made me feel like a baby, honestly. Hey, Ollie. Hey, Ollie. Alright, I was going to ask
- you if you want to hear a joke. I'm just going to tell it.
- Why do... As I was saying, why do bees have... Why do bees have sticky hair? Stop. It's too good. Because
- they use honeycombs. Stop.
- Uh, our next act is... Oh, yeah, yeah. Man. Stop. Uh, hey, Ollie. What? What's a computer's favorite
- snack? Ollie? Like a chip? No.
- Microchip. Stop. When are you going to stop drinking Dr. Pepper? I can't stall for this long also. Oopsies.
- What do you mean oopsies?
- So this is the last act before the intermission, and we've collected $400 for the Harmony family in
- need. But I want to remind you, our goal is $1,000. So there's a box out here at this door, and there's
- a bowl out here by the concession stand that the high school's... The high school's also trying to raise
- money for their spring trip, as I said before.
- but there's a bowl out there marked donations and the box out there so we can, whatever you can give
- to help this family out would really, really be great. I also wanted to mention there's some people
- that wanted me to say the people that parked in the middle of the parking lot, at the intermission,
- you might want to move your car somewhere else onto the street. I think there's room on the street and
- it's not raining, but some people are having a hard time getting their cars out. And lastly, I wanted
- to thank BCAT who's streaming this
- around the world and Dave Walters who comes every year for the last many years. The next act is Don't
- Stop Believing by the Staff of Infection. Shout out to my balding father. Everyone give him a cheer
- in three, two, one.
- It's a small town girl living in a lonely world.
- Smell of wine and cheap perfume for a smile they can share.
- Well, well, well. Awesome stuff, Ben. Hello! How's it going, everybody? It's Shafar. He's back. Shafar!
- I'm supposed to not be on stage anymore. He's supposed to not be on stage, but he's here. He broke in.
- We couldn't stop him. Exactly. You cannot stop me. I will come back every year. Okay. All right. Yuki,
- come on. Come on out.
- Would you guys like to do the announcing? Yeah, let's do the announcing. All right. What a show. It's
- been great so far. Those EC peers are adorable. Yeah, Bo and Ozzy can really belt it out. All right.
- Enjoy the intermission. Go buy some refreshments from the high school. It's a fundraiser for our spring
- trip to Al Capulco. See you back here in 15 minutes. Everything goes to the high school. Give us money, please.
- be making can ASMR. Okay, let's do this. Stop booing. The next act is about a girl
- with Dawes, Zander, Malachi, and by Dr. Skins. I don't know. Dr. Gray? Later.
- easy friend I do with an A2 land I do think you fit this shoe I do think you have a clue take advantage
- while hang me out to dry but I can't see you every night free
- I'm standing in your line. I do hope you have the time. I do pick a number two. I do keep a date with
- you. I take advantage while you hang me out to dry, but I can't see you every night.
- I do with an A to lend I do think you fit this shoe I do think you have a clue I'll take advantage while
- you hang me out to dry But I can't see you every night Oh I can't see you every night
- I do I do I do
- Hello there, I am back. Did you know that the first French fries weren't actually fried in French? They
- were actually fried in Greece. Now this one's for Zevin. What did the pickle say to the other pickle?
- Deal with it.
- I have a really funny joke about procrastination. I'll tell it to you guys later. You know, I am really
- pro at procrastination. Though some of the other MCs might not be that much pro at procrastination.
- And all of
- You know, my mom always tells me that carrots are good for your eyesight. I mean, have you ever seen
- a rabbit with glasses?
- Why was the bagel so good at golf? It always got a hole in one. Why was the bagel in the cage? It was
- bred in captivity. Why was the bagel so lazy? It was slow to rise.
- What do you do when you combine a donut with a bagel? You get a high bread? But anyway, the next act
- is Old Churchyard, sung by Bella.
- I so well know those paths need the soft greens for. Friends slumber in there that we want to regard.
- We will trace out their names in the old churchyard. More not for them, for their tribe.
- their sleep, though cold and hard, their pillows may be in the old churchyard. I know that it's true
- when a friend's deep heart to breathe kind words to a broken heart. And I know that the joy of life is mine.
- Follow us, friends, to the old churchyard. But were I at rest near your new tree, why would you weep,
- my friend, for me? I'm so weary, so inward. Why would you retard the peace I seek in the old churchyard
- before me?
- go to that haven of rest where no tears ever flow. And I fear not my fate when it's time to depart when
- we'll sail with the sun in the old churchyard. I rest in the hope that one bright day sunshine
- Trumpets will sound in the hills near and far We'll wake up the dead in the old churchyard I rest in
- the hope that one bright day
- I'm not much of a stand-up comedian. Sage, I'm going to sit down real quick. Yeah, he's more of a sit-down
- comedian, if you know what I mean. Yeah. Absurd. Yes. Exhibit A. But that was a fun act, what I'd say.
- But also, I just learned during intermission that a lot of my grandparents and other family members
- are watching over live stream. And I bet a bunch of
- a bunch of yours are too. So I'm just going to give a shout out to all of them live stream. So hello.
- Hello. Everybody say hello. Hello. That's right. Say bye. Bye. But OK. Our next act is Bleed by Jaxx
- Tanier Guestner. Is that what I said? Give me some room. OK. I don't know. I don't know.
- That was him.
- Tell me how, how did you hide? I meant so easy. The ghost is so close around the room. It lets me know
- that letting ghosts is not the same with you. Now every night I lay here in this bed we made for two.
- But I'm sleeping alone while you're out there with somebody. And there's hope that he cares in the way
- that I did you.
- Abandon me here. I'm lost up in my head again. I'm caught inside myself. You promised that it wouldn't
- end, but you left me.
- It's still the same, tell me how. How did your heart run so easy? Don't give up just because it's hard.
- Come back and heal me before I look scarred. You tell me we took this too far. As soon as I let down
- my guard, when you needed it most, as you cried, I was soaked. It's been weeks since
- Got your mom, dropped my clothes And she tried to console me Love comes and goes And it's not nothing
- you owe me But you let me, you let me down
- All I have in here are bagel jokes. I blame Umi. I'm not lying. Why are bagels religious? They're very
- holy. What do you do if a bagel feels unwell? Spread it, it'll feel much butter. It's just full of these.
- What do you get when you combine a donut and a bagel? A high bread.
- Buckets of them. Yuki. Yeah. I don't know. Somebody yelled your name. Hey, Ellie. OK. Do you want to
- do one real quick? Jokes. I love jokes. You know, biologists have been doing crazy things lately. I
- read just last week they combined DNA from a cheetah and a crab. Right. What happened? Things went sideways
- real fast. That one's good.
- Why don't sharks bite clowns? I don't know. Why? They taste funny. You're awkward. Whoever said awkward,
- I'm going to find it. We got the bagel incident because of course we do. It's on brand.
- a bagel? Yep. Which one do you like? Actually, you can have that one. Ow, my tooth. This tastes funny.
- My plan worked. Hey, what is that?
- It's my pet, I don't know, I'm just a poor old bagel salesman. Well, it has to go to animal control.
- Ugh. Anyways, back to the drawing board.
- technical difficulty, there was a child in the stairwell, not my fault. Yeah, we know. Yeah, go ahead.
- Hey, Gabe. That's me. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? I did tell that one, you know.
- You did? Yeah, I did. Go ahead. Everybody loves it. Come on.
- Okay, they're ready already. There's already people telling us to get off stage. We got a copycat by
- Billie Eilish, sung by Ari and Riley. Come on. Don't be cautious
- I'm your crime Push my button Anytime you got your finger on the trigger Bet your trigger finger's mine
- Silver dollar
- On that torches
- Testing, testing. I have gummy bears now. Hey, can I have?
- Our next act is reverse jokes with Cotton Weaver. Enjoy. Later. Oh my gosh. Hello, everyone. How are
- you guys doing tonight? That's pretty good. Did you guys come out to see some comedy?
- Yeah, so did I. I bought a pretty fancy ticket all the way down here from Thailand, and I came to see
- the best comedy show in the world. You guys. So, does anyone have any jokes for me? Please raise your
- hand if you do. Yeah. Yeah.
- What? So funny. Ground beef. I already knew it. It's not funny. What? Okay. Oh wow. You hear that mom?
- We'll have to jump a kid later.
- Anyone else got any jokes? What you got? I can't see, like, the people right here, because the lamps,
- like... Yeah, you. Why? Ah, shucks, man. What you got? Why? Who's there?
- That's pretty good. I like that. Anyone else? Whoever that was. That wasn't the same voice. Who's there?
- Who's there?
- All right, thank you guys for this amazing comedy show. See y'all next year. Maybe. I don't know. Hey,
- Ari. Hi. Does that act nice? Yeah. Kind of reminds me of a joke. Hey, Ari.
- What do you call a dog that's a magician? What? A labra cadabador. That's a funny joke. What's your
- favorite thing about Switzerland? I don't know. I think the flag is big plus.
- The next song is Cinder's song by Gus. When I was a little girl my mother always told me one day a prince
- will come, my love. But as I grew, I knew it was a princess who would hold me as I looked to the stars
- for you, my love. Oh, my love, as the cannons were blazing, I looked to the stars for you, my love.
- Oh, my love, as our cities you were raising, I looked to the stars
- For you, my love. My world was left a-burning and my royal house a-bleeding. I looked to the stars.
- For you, my love. My stepmother and sisters betrayed our world, conceding. I looked to the stars.
- For you, my love. Oh, my love.
- I saw you, my love. Oh, my love. My soul was then arisen. I looked through the stars to you, my love.
- A godmother in white, she came and led me to your crimson. At last in my arms, my love. Together now
- we long to hear the matrimonial hymn sung eternally bound.
- To you, my love Oh, my love As the flames opened fire On our wedding day I ran to my love They give
- me my love Inside of me ever higher I ran to the stars Without you, my love Years have passed yet still
- I search I know they cannot hide you I searched through the stars
- for you, my love. My ring will lead me to you and the life they have denied you. I search through the
- stars for you, my love. Oh, my love, then we'll finally meet again.
- Oh, my love. Oh, my love. Oh, my love. Your cinders will come for you, my love. Is this thing on? Hello.
- Can you hear me there in the back?
- Let's hear some noise. Thank you for your enthusiasm. But I have the gummy bears now. Look. I'm tired
- of this. Anyway. What did the rabbit with the hairdryer say to the snowman? I don't know. What? Give
- me the nose and no one gets hurt.
- But that's a knee-slapper. Why did Santa retire? Gee, I don't know. Why? He lost his present sense of
- purpose. Ready? Our next act is the whole... Right. By Gus and Aiden. Give them a hand, everyone!
- Hey Guts, have you seen my copy of the greatest book of all time? How to Train Your Dragon, The Omnibus?
- Yeah. Pretty sure it fell in the hole. What hole? Oh my God, what is that? A hole? Yeah, I can see that,
- but where'd it come from? Well, I woke up this morning. There was a hole. Well, what are you gonna do
- about it? Well, I put a rug over it, but...
- It fell in the hole. Shouldn't we, like, call the police or something? Well, I did, but... Um... Where
- are they? Well, they're in the hole. Where's your sister, Gus? Where is your sister? She's at work.
- Oh. Where does she work? In the hole. God, how even deep is this thing?
- favorite mug. Now it's in the hole. Gus, I mean, what could this thing even be? I mean, for all we know,
- it could be an interdimensional wormhole or a gateway to hell or Gus, Gus, Gus. Hey, what's up? I got
- some whatever this is. Dude, will you please take this seriously?
- What was that? A hole person? Well, where'd it come from? Oh, right. The hole. Yeah. Dude, why are you
- being so calm about this anyway? I'm more worried about the space octopus. Space octopus? Well, that one.
- Okay, where'd the talent and the talent show go? It's in the hole. Take that. Ha ha! What even is this?
- That's not mine. Your mother's from the hole! Okay, Yugi, how did the hammerhead shark do on his test?
- He nailed it. There are a lot of sharks here. Who delivers presents to sharks at Christmas? Santa Jaws,
- because it's sharks. I'm doing my MC thing. Give me a second. Okay, we have Zombie by the
- We've got again by Vivian Wicker.
- Only end up wanting, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. What's everything not?
- and I would also like to thank the stage, the tech crew, my crew, and everyone else who helped this
- performance. Thank you. Guess what? It's me and Yuki again, and we got more jokes about sharks. Yay!
- I heard that. Anyways, why don't sharks bite lawyers?
- Professional courtesy. Because they're both awful. I don't know. I have a really funny joke
- about procrastination. What is it? I'll tell it to you later. I don't... Okay. All right. So we've got
- Zombie, played by Z-Region, which is the coolest name ever, by the way.
- Does a flower ride a bike? I don't know. How? With its petals, duh. That's so funny. Yeah, I know, right?
- So what do you call a dog's car? What? A Ferrari. That's a knee slapper.
- but cannot hear. What? A cornfield. Okay. The next act is the third annual student solidarity skit.
- All right. The weekly pizza toppings have been really popular, but we need some new ideas. Any thoughts?
- OK, I've got one. Hear me out. Burger, pizza. That's just two different foods. OK, what about pizza,
- pizza? I'm pretty sure they already sell that at Little Caesar's. Pizza, pizza. Oh, wait. Back when
- Pizza Day first started, Student Solidarity made a list of possible topics. Hear ye, hear ye, members
- of Scholar Solidarity. Scholar Solidarity? What was this made?
- 1976. Wow. I didn't know student solidarity had historical roots. I know, right? Anyway, here are some
- of the suggestions. Let's see. Gruel. Ugh. Cockroaches. Ugh. Does it actually say that? Seeing as we
- are so lucky to have a surplus of them, cockroaches are a very viable option.
- Wow, things haven't really changed from the olden days. At least we have air conditioning now. Yeah,
- and it only took five decades. And we're still waiting on the heating. Jelly eels, fish heads, are there
- any good ones? Oh wait, this one's not that bad. Ginger. Oh no, that says gingers. I'm feeling very
- targeted right now. How do you think I felt when they added olive pizza?
- Okay, there has to be something edible on there. Let me see that. Oh, never mind. What is it? Pineapple.
- You horrible humans. You made a whole bit about how, oh, there's nothing that could possibly be worse
- than all these disgusting items that we put on the list. And then you go, pineapple? Really? You're
- stuck with your traditional Italian pizzas and your Gutenberg printing presses. Get in the future. Get
- in the now. There you go. Pineapples are actually good. Yeah, pineapples are cool. SpongeBob approves, OK? Yes.
- Somebody's saying things. Yep. All right. You do bagel jokes. I don't know. Bagels are funny, apparently.
- Well, how about instead of a bagel joke, instead of doing six, seven, we do eight, nine. No. No. I thought
- I trusted you. I thought I trusted you. OK. OK. We got an app.
- We really do have an act. We got Where Is My Mind by the Pixies, played by Clara Moore. Moore, Moore.
- Hello, I am back. But with a guest. But anyway, how about we hear a joke from this wonderful person?
- Never mind that. I ain't not. But seriously, seriously. Why are bagels so good for family reunions?
- Because they are a wonderful activity for the whole family.
- Anyway, this next act is maybe this time from a song by Yuki.
- Maybe this time he'll stay. Maybe this time for the first time love won't hurry.
- Thank you. That was a great act, wasn't it? Yeah, it was. You bet. OK, so the next joke is about a meme
- that's been going on around here in school. Oh. Oh, no. Pierce, Riley, what's six plus seven? Oh.
- Beats me. Six, seven.
- Do you guys have any jokes? Of course. What are they? What did the one wall say to the other? What?
- I don't know. What's a reptile's favorite show? I don't know. What? The Lizard of Oz. Okay, the next stack.
- is Vynowski's piano concerto, played by Alina. I don't know if I said that right.
- how good of a brand Haribo was. Tell me about it. I still want those gummy bears, you know. Oh, yeah.
- Oh, well. Well, this is my last, this is the last act, so I'm going to put up my kind of funny ones.
- My actually funny ones. Okay. What do you call a bankrupt Santa?
- I don't know. St. Nicholas. Ain't that a knee slapper, folks? Let me hear some chuckles. Come on.
- There we go. That's the spirit. Okay. That's the spirit. All right. Let's see. Why did the snowman leave
- the party early? I don't know.
- Because he felt emotionally thawed out. I mean, right? I mean, you would, too, if it was a party full
- of peers, I guess. But it looks like Brock has something to say, so we'll be right back after these
- messages. So they're going to introduce the next act here in a second. I wanted you to know that thanks
- to all of you and the people that are here for the first
- before the intermission for the first half of the show, that we actually raised over $1,300 for that
- Harmony family. And they still have a GoFundMe campaign. Anything you can do for them on your way out
- or telling other people about it. I think many people, families have received their GoFundMe. If you
- want to take a copy of the QR code and share it with other people, they can use the help.
- So again, thank you. And in the Harmony tradition after this act, any of you can stick around and help
- put chairs away. We have a dance here that goes on Wednesday night. We want to get the chairs out of
- here, so it's ready to go for the dance. So thank you. Have a safe drive home. Hey, folks. We're back.
- And my assistant, or am I his assistant, Ollie, with some jokes. Take it away, Ollie. OK.
- Rock, how do you feel about giving me something I need for gummy bears? Huh? Hello? Wait, what? I need
- gummy bears. You, you, you, you spent them all over the yard. I don't have any. Okay, I don't have any
- gummy bears. You ate all of them. I just have one handful. That singular handful, that was such a glorious
- moment in my life.
- Why do reindeers fly? I don't know. Why? Because it's faster than walking. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I actually
- never tried. Is it faster than walking? Well, I guess I'm a plane, but that has jets. Does Santa's sleigh
- have jets? What a question to ask. OK. How do you get to the North Pole? Gee, I don't know. You put
- a stick and point it north, I guess.
- You start at the South Pole and head anywhere. OK, that's fair. But what if you start on the South Pole
- and head to the South Pole? You're already in the South Pole. I know, right? Exactly. I mean, right?
- Come on. You're out of gummy bears.
- Let's see here. Why did the... So two scientists walk into a bar and the first one says,
- I love some H2O please. Oh yeah? And then the second one says, I love some H2O too. Oh yeah? And then,
- when they get their drinks, and the two scientists drink, the second one falls down dead. Do you know
- why? I feel like the nerds out there would know. The nerds out there would know. Science. You know?
- Yeah. So, thank you very much. Are we ready? Later folks. So, the next act is...
- We'll meet again with Sophia and Alex. Did I get that right? Whoa! Yeah! Woo! Yeah! See ya, folks! Woo!
- Sorry, everyone. Her amp wasn't working, so. We'll meet again.
- But I know we'll meet again some sunny day. Keep smiling through just like you always do. And the blue
- skies, just the gray skies,
- The folks that I know Tell them I won't be long
- Don't know
- this thing on. Yes. Hey, Gabe. Don't leave yet. Don't leave yet. Hey, we're doing a bit. We're doing
- a bit. Sit down. Sit down. Ollie, quick. Now. Come on. We're leaving. Hey, Gabe.
- Where do Polbers keep their money? Where? That's no banks. Okay, okay, we're doing the outro. Okay,
- we're doing the outro. That was our show. We hope you enjoyed ourselves. Thank you again to all of our
- sponsors, including John Bethel Title Company, Inkwell Bakery, Bilcy Brown and Associates Southern Indiana
- Pediatric Dentistry,
- Baker's Family Dentistry, and a very special thank you to Brightside Cafe and the Commercial Circus.
- Have a great night, a great holiday season, and please put away your chairs. Thank you and good night!
- Muahahaha!